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What do you have at your closings? A stripper dance on the conference table perhaps?

October 21, 2009

LegsWhat do you have at your closings? A stripper dance on the conference table perhaps?

I finally attended the closing from hell today. There were those who said it would never happen. No, it was not a short sale, or even a foreclosure. The details don’t matter, the closing was oh, about 16 weeks late. Things happened, things were said, lies were told, people got hurt. I am proud of one thing, I didn’t participate in the negative behavior. Neither did the other agent. We were above board all the time and acted with the utmost professionalism. The attorneys were also awesome, they deserve something really special.

So, here we are at the closing table. No clients, a representative for the seller stopped by with the keys. Just 2 attorneys, 2 real estate agents and a paralegal at a very large conference table. What happened next was like a scene from a Monty Python movie. The front door opened, a woman proceeded to let herself in despite the fact it was after 5 pm and there was no one at the front desk. She had a dog with her, a cute little Shih-Tzu. She came into the conference room, sat down at the head of the table and placed the dog on the conference room table.


The dance began slowly and seductively. The cute little Shih-Tzu stopped at each person, nuzzling us, enticing each and every one of us to reach out and stroke the soft fur. I was, as every one else at the table was, mesmerized, speechless. The dog danced over the closing documents, the certified checks, the things that took our blood, sweat, tears and sanity to bring to fruition. I was half expecting to see a pole appear in the center of the table, if you know what I mean. Or watch her squat over the checks.

Very bizarre indeed, and a fitting end to the most difficult transaction I have ever had.

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